A lamentation on tires

Lamentation is a pretty strong word, and not normally associated with tires. Actually, it isn't a very commonly used word at all. It's so uncommon, in fact, that on the first page of a Google search of "how common is the word lamentation", two results were references the the Bible's book of Lamentations, six were dictionary definitions. one was the pronunciation of "lamentation" in Spanish, and the other one just made me LOL IRL (a little interwebz jargon thrown in for humor!): the Afrikaans translation of lamentation.

In other words, it is not a commonly used word.

So, for all of my non-native English speaking audience out there, I would suggest not using "lamentation" when referring to a flat tire. "Sorrow" is probably not a good word either. "Upset" or "mad" would be good, polite words. I'm a bit ashamed to say that the best words to describe or talk about a flat tire are the ones I used this past Saturday night, and they were neither nice or polite. They're not what one would would consider polite words. They're words with an Anglo-Saxon origin and are common in Rap, Hip-Hop, and the collected works of Chris Rock, Denis Leary and most politicians. Yes, in the heat of the moment, I stooped down to the level of actors and politicians. I used asterisk words. Out loud.

****!

Tire being inflated

And why were these words deployed? Well, partly from a lack of self-discipline, triggered by the ridiculousness of the situation. You see, I've been driving for over thirty-five years. and prior to 2014 have had TWO flats. Period.  Since purchasing our Subaru in 2014, we've had FOUR flats on that car. Let me explain.

Flat #1 was from construction debris across the street from my employer. Flat #2 was from a Macy's parking lot- we will NEVER shop at Macy's again- EVER. Flats #3 and #4 were courtesy of the State of Illinois' I-90 expansion project, which has also killed one contractor. My flats are insignificant in comparison with the loss of a life, but speak volumes towards the lack of quality of the contractor. 

So, first thing Monday morning, I'll be on the phone with Subaru's roadside assistance program, getting a lift to Grand Subaru for a tire repair or replacement.

As always, I am hochspeyer, blogging data analysis and management so you don't have to.