A lamentation on tires

Lamentation is a pretty strong word, and not normally associated with tires. Actually, it isn't a very commonly used word at all. It's so uncommon, in fact, that on the first page of a Google search of "how common is the word lamentation", two results were references the the Bible's book of Lamentations, six were dictionary definitions. one was the pronunciation of "lamentation" in Spanish, and the other one just made me LOL IRL (a little interwebz jargon thrown in for humor!): the Afrikaans translation of lamentation.

In other words, it is not a commonly used word.

So, for all of my non-native English speaking audience out there, I would suggest not using "lamentation" when referring to a flat tire. "Sorrow" is probably not a good word either. "Upset" or "mad" would be good, polite words. I'm a bit ashamed to say that the best words to describe or talk about a flat tire are the ones I used this past Saturday night, and they were neither nice or polite. They're not what one would would consider polite words. They're words with an Anglo-Saxon origin and are common in Rap, Hip-Hop, and the collected works of Chris Rock, Denis Leary and most politicians. Yes, in the heat of the moment, I stooped down to the level of actors and politicians. I used asterisk words. Out loud.

****!

Tire being inflated

And why were these words deployed? Well, partly from a lack of self-discipline, triggered by the ridiculousness of the situation. You see, I've been driving for over thirty-five years. and prior to 2014 have had TWO flats. Period.  Since purchasing our Subaru in 2014, we've had FOUR flats on that car. Let me explain.

Flat #1 was from construction debris across the street from my employer. Flat #2 was from a Macy's parking lot- we will NEVER shop at Macy's again- EVER. Flats #3 and #4 were courtesy of the State of Illinois' I-90 expansion project, which has also killed one contractor. My flats are insignificant in comparison with the loss of a life, but speak volumes towards the lack of quality of the contractor. 

So, first thing Monday morning, I'll be on the phone with Subaru's roadside assistance program, getting a lift to Grand Subaru for a tire repair or replacement.

As always, I am hochspeyer, blogging data analysis and management so you don't have to.

No plan of battle survives first contact with the enemy

Well, that's how I learned this particular truism. According to von Moltke the Elder, "No plan of operations extends with certainty beyond the first encounter with the enemy's main strength" (or "no plan survives contact with the enemy"). His idea of warfare seemed to be plan, plan and then make some more plans- maybe not too bad an idea for business? Such has been my experience with the first day of Mr. T's and my grandiose plan to bring Order and Balance to the Chaos which is currently the Secret Underground Lair (SUL) in only seven days. Monday is done, and quite honestly, our chances for success are looking rather bleak.

Still, I'm an optimist.

We've decided to tackle the project in fairly easily manageable stages. The first stage involved the relocating of a small bookcase and its base from the east wall (next to Mr. T) to the west wall. Not a big deal, but Jennifer is also moving things outside of the SUL. What she is doing is important in our little world and needs to be done, but our home is not large (by American standards) so my progress was greatly hindered, but in a good way. I ended up tackling another area in the SUL, which needs to be tackled and will help out with the upcoming work of the next few days. Still, at the end of the first day, I had hope for more progress. But, as Vivien Leigh (as Scarlett O'Hara) said in "Gone With the Wind", "After all, tomorrow is another day". And Tuesday is done.

It's Wednesday evening, and this is my last SUL update for this entry. Jennifer and I got up early today and took our trusty Subaru Outback, Meerkat, for a Springtime checkup. We drove down to Grand Subaru for an oil change, tire rotation and a surprise complimentary wash- which included our epically salt-encrusted floor mats. On the way home, Jennifer heard about a special sale a local bakery was having, and although we knew of them both by their reputation and having sampled their products, we had never been there before. We decided to check the sale out, as it was not too far out of our way home.

Chicago's National Hockey League (NHL) franchise, the Blackhawks, is in the playoffs for the Stanley Cup- the League championship. So, Central Continental Bakery is having a merchandise promotion: when the Hawks win, Continental Bakery will have a special discount on one of their items the following day. The Hawks won last night, so today's special was a 20% discount on eclairs. Let me state firmly and without reservation that I love eclairs. As a family, we seldom have desserts, and when we do they are generally something Jennifer has made.  So, to go out of the way to actually purchase a dessert is nearly unheard of.

The bakery is commonly known as Continental Bakery, and features a dizzying variety of what seems to be primarily pastries of central European origin (Danish, German, Polish, Austrian, Slovak, Moravian, Czech, Swiss). When we first walked in, our experience was this: we were smacked upside the head with EUROPE. It was like walking into Dr. Who's Tardis in Chicago and stepping out in Hochspeyer, Echternach or Tønder. The bakery's customer area is laid out in an L shape, and not a bit of space is wasted- even the decor drew us into a happier time across the Atlantic... had I looked out the window, I would not have been surprised to see a German vendor selling Itälienisch Eis from his little truck or a Citroën 2CV idling at the stoplight.

I said I had tried their wares before. Continental Bakery is famous throughout Chicagoland as THE baker and purveyor of pączki. The interesting thing about this pastry is that it is only available on one day each year at Continental Bakery: the day before the Catholic feast of Ash Wednesday, or "Fat Tuesday". On this day, the bakery is open and operating for twenty-four hours, cranking out pączki. This event is often featured on local television news.

So, we walked into the bakery with very high expectations and were not disappointed. The eclairs were beyond my words to describe, and we also picked up some soft cheesy garlic breadsticks, as well as sampling a few of their butter cookies. To quote Arnold; "I'll be back".

This is a bit lengthier than my usual posts, so I'm calling this a wrap- data next time! 

As always, I am hochspeyer, blogging data analysis and management so you don't have to. 

A new year

This is turning out to be the blog that refuses to be written. For those regular readers in my audience, you know where I'm coming from- there are just some days (weeks, months), where the well is just plain dry, and your best efforts to come up with a subject, opening line ( or even a title, for Pete's sake!) are all for naught. I started writing this particular post by erasing all of my work from two nights ago. I've gotta say, it was poignant, riveting and in the end, TMI (*too much information).

And uncharacteristically even for keyboard-challenged yours truly, I'm blundering at about the rate of three typos per line- a big number even for me.

So anyway, I'm on vacation this week. We generally don't do anything special when I have vacation- I'm hoping for a day trip or two later in the week. As I write this, it's September 1st, and as it's the first Monday of September, it's Labor day. It's evolved into the end-of-summer holiday here in the States... I think I had written a similar post earlier about Memorial Day, and how it had devolved into the beginning-of-summer holiday....

I was able to get the grass cut before it rained this morning, which amazed Jennifer. I am NOT a morning person, and doing work in the morning is even more amazing. The yard looks nice, and everyone is happy. Tomorrow- Tuesday- I'll probably take our some weeds and dead sunflowers. I was a bit disappointed with our sunflowers this year; we had purchased some seeds around the beginning of summer with the intention of planting second crop, but never planted them... work schedule, don't you know.

So now it's September, pretty much officially Autumn. The song on my mind is the Mamas and the Papas' "California Dreamin'. Not necessarily because I'm a fan of the song or the group- or even California, but because- even though the song is set in California, it reminds me of the leaves changing colors in autumn. It always has. Put this song on, and my mind is suddenly in Horicon Marsh, Wisconsin, waiting for the next big wave of birds to take off or land.

And in keeping with the theme of I've got nothing to write, two days have passed since this blog was updated. I'm listening to Chris Tomlin's Burning Lights as I write this, and finally have had some things to report that were interesting (at least to me!).

For starters, we took Meerkat in for her first scheduled service today. We made an appointment for the service with Grand Subaru, and made sure that Sandy would be in. She's a lot of fun, and knows her stuff when it comes to Subarus , which is a good thing, as she sells them for a living! So, while Meerkat was getting an oil change and general checkup, Jennifer and I test-drove a few different vehicles- a Crosstrek and an Impreza Sport, both 2014's.

The thing that really stinks about test driving cars is that car dealerships in the United States seem to congregate on highly-trafficked roads. On the plus side, you get a good feel for how your prospective vehicle will operate in the real world; on the negative side, there are few opportunities for hard accelerating, hard braking or hard cornering... and quite honestly, I'm sure dealers REALLY don't want prospective buyers putting too much punishment on their demonstrators, especially if they're a high-volume dealership without a "dedicated" group of demonstrator vehicles. After all,Subaru has a break-in period where hard breaking and certain torque thresholds are to be avoided.

Still, even within these restrictions, Jennifer and I got a good feel for both of the cars. As current Subaru owners, I think our expectations were fairly high, and both vehicles met them. Both were peppy, had crisp throttle response and were very responsive to the steering wheel. The manually-shiftable CVT is a hoot to drive, with steering wheel mounted paddle shifters- this was the first automatic transmission that I've ever driven that actually engaged me as a driver.

Straight line performance (acceleration) was satisfying- especially in light of the Crosstrek's allegedly anemic 2.0L. The Crosstrek weighs at ~300lbs (10%) less that our Outback, so in terms of HP/weight, we're actually experiencing a bit more raw power to the wheels in the Crosstrek vs the Outback- and I believe the Crosstrek is a bit better on fuel economy as well.

So, we're probably going to go with the Crosstrek. To be perfectly honest, I liked the Impreza Sport a bit better, but I have to be a realist: if three vehicles were in our future, there would be no discussion. However, with my iffy foot and knee, the higher entry height just makes more sense for us- so its the Crosstrek.The other thing that Sandy said was something like," I'm not selling you anything but the orange one" This, of course, was after which one she would have recommended- she was all Crosstrek. To which I replied, "It would be cool to have one in the Subaru Rally Blue,"  To which she replied, "$4K option".

Well, sorry if this ended up being a Subaru ad... not really! We're hooked up with a great dealership, a super salesperson and a just plain fun to drive vehicle. Maybe someday I can buy an old WRX for cheap and run it noncompetitively.

*Before I forget, 42 is in production again! This is exciting, and I hope to have updates soon.

That's all for now. It was a day featuring test driving, and that was fun. As always, I am hochspeyer, blogging data analysis and management so you don't have to.

T minus 100, or possibly M minus 100... or so

In my last post, I had mentioned (well, okay, it was the topic of the post) that Jennifer and I had purchased a new 2014 Subaru Outback from Grand Subaru- and I'm giving them another plug because we were THAT pleased with our experience there). I've only seen Sandy interact with a few other customers, but I've observed a technique she uses that I like. Just before a prospective customer heads out the door for a test drive, she always (in a good-natured tone of voice) admonishes them to "keep it under 120!" (~190KPH). As one who has sold things for a living in the past, I can appreciate her particular choice of words.  On the surface, she's reminding the prospect to be careful, and that she is responsible for the vehicle. Peel a layer or two off, and its a reminder that the 2.5L engine under the hood is a beast that has won rally races around the world- after all, this ain't your father's Oldsmobile (old General Motors advertising slogan). Finally, on another entirely different level, its an invitation to let the clutch out and mash your right foot down and just get a taste of what you could have....

(*ahem) But I digress.

When we took delivery of our Outback, Sandy took us to the garage/service area of the dealership and gave us a whirlwind tour of some of the car's features. Just before we left, she advised us to read the manual as questions came up and call/email her for anything. And, make sure to observe the 500 mile break-in period (well, I thought she said 500 miles; a website I saw recently recommends 1000 miles [1600Km]). This latest discovery bums me out, as we just turned over 406 miles on the odometer.

The car still has not experienced 5th or 6th gear. (FRACK!FRACK!FRACK!)

I SO want to get this car on the open road and use those gears!

In other news, Jennifer was down in the Secret Underground Lair last night asking about dinner. I was working on my media library and listening to a Backstreet Boys song. She raised her eyebrows at this, as I am decidedly NOT a Backstreet Boys sort of person in any stretch of the imagination. So, I had to show her the YouTube video of two Chinese dudes lip-synching this song. And then I got to thinking about YouTube videos which had become memes.... at least in my e-world; Stuff like Numa Numa... which, of course, I also had to watch. But I did not watch Boxxy. In fact, I am not even going to post a link to Boxxy... if you don't know Boxxy, I am not going to lead you down this particular rabbit hole. You'll just have to look Boxxy up on your own.

On the data front,, there's nothing new to report. My Music Recordings table is functional, and the database now lives on an actual HDD. Going forward, the backup will be on a flash drive rather than the flash being the primary storage.

Finally, I recently had the opportunity to participate in a discussion in an Excel group I am a member of on LinkedIn. The topic was essentially how can an Excel "power user" be defined; that is, what is the minimum skillset needed to be recognized as such? Well, I'm not sure about anyone else here, but I started my contribution to the discussion by saying that I am certainly not a power user, but at times have been a subject matter expert. My feeling about power users is that they should have the ability to use both Excel and Access, and have to discern which is the better solution- or, use them together when necessary.  

As always, I am hochspeyer, blogging data analysis and management so you don't have to (and, for the moment, our Outback).

Drivers, pt 3

Jennifer and I bought a new car this past week- it was our first new car purchase in fifteen years. We purchased a 2014 Subaru Outback. Created in the mind of Fuji Heavy Industries and built in the United States, this car is simply amazing.  I showed a picture of it to my coworker Anna, and she simply said, "Road trip".

Truth be told, this car absolutely is pleading for us to take it on a road trip. We have at least four destinations in mind, and three are relatively easy day trips... but we are taking it easy until we get the car properly broken in and I have a few consecutive days off!

When we visited Grand Subaru for a test drive, our salesperson Sandy Jackson jestingly told us to  "keep it under 120 (mph, ~190kph). I had some issues on the test drive. For starters, the analog instruments on the Subaru seemed to be reversed from the truck I was trading in (that is, the positions on the dashboard of the speedometer and tachometer were reversed from what I was accustomed to).  Jennifer kept on asking me to slow down, and every time she did, it took a moment for me to figure out how fast we were actually traveling. Also, the Outback we test drove had all of five miles on the odometer, and the gearbox required more effort shifting than did that of our fifteen year old Escort.

We test drove the base model Outback, and it was fun to drive. We brought it back- all too soon- and were pretty impressed with the vehicle. We talked some more with Sandy about the price. I was looking through the brochure, and I noticed that the Premium model (one level up from the base model) had an all weather package; I asked Sandy what was in that, so she started listing some features, and as soon as she said "heated mirrors" I knew that was the model which we needed.

As it was very close to the end of the model year it took around two weeks, I think, to get our Outback. Sandy had located one with a dark interior and exterior, as well as a manual transmission, but it got sold before she could secure it.  Not long after, she found one with the dark interior and manual transmission, and she called and asked in silver was acceptable... sure, we told her. When we went down to pick it up, trade the pickup and get all of the paperwork done, we noticed that the car has a little bit of blue in the silver- we like the color very much.

It took me a few days before I actually had the courage to start taking the Outback to work. I've mentioned before that I work in the largest industrial park in the United States.Some of the folks where I work drive a good distance to get to this job, so there are more than a few "beaters" in the parking lot. I very carefully sized up my parking prospects before the Outback's first trip, and I figured that the best place to park would be close to Anna's late-model sporty import.

So, how do we like it?

Well, since this is our first new vehicle in fifteen years, there's a bit of a learning curve, to say the least. Subaru has thoughtfully produced a quite comprehensive owner's manual... its actually larger than a few of my software books- and that is a feat! Since I work at night, one of the very first features I noticed was that every control in the Outback has soft red backlighting. The cabin is quiet enough to have a conversation with a rear seat passenger in a normal tone of voice. The doors close and lock with quiet authority. There are too many features to list here, but there are a few which I really like. Having grown up with vehicles that had manual trannys, Jennifer and I both set the parking brake almost without thinking. The Outback has an electronic parking brake, as well as a separate hill mode- if you drive a stick and have ever accidentally let the car roll a bit before setting the parking brake, you can see how handy the hill assist is. There's a little blue, thermostat-shaped light on the control panel that shuts off when the engine has reached operating temperature. Lastly, there's a center console which has a lid that flips up for storage. What's ingenious is that the lid covers two spaces: the large, "normal" storage space, and there is a smaller space directly under the lid. We're not quite sure what the upper area is for just yet, but its neat knowing its there. The console storage area underneath has a 12V output, a USB socket and a 3.5mm socket, the 3.5mm connection to hook one's MP3 player or cell phone to the stereo (of course this can also be done via Bluetooth).

I suppose you've had enough gravy, so how about some meat?  I think I had mentioned recently that I really love driving. Ever since I saw Petter Solberg race for Subaru in a WRX, I knew that Subaru made a tough car. I don't think I'll ever have a WRX STI or even the "plain" WRX, but for the way I drive the Outback is a worthy stand-in. It doesn't have the intercooled turbo, but it does have the 2.5L boxer engine, which is peppy and powerful- a certain fellow in a Corvette that I went nose-to-nose with will attest to that ( I hope his suspension was okay after he hit those rough double railroad tracks at 50+ MPH [~80KPH]). I'm glad for his sake that we weren't racing, though- I'm pretty sure I could hold my own in the corners, and I think I could outbrake him... I'd definitely turn tighter! Yep, I learned this after driving the Outback for a week and logging less than 100 miles (~161KM) on the odometer.

And as much as I'd love to keep on talking about the Outback, there's some big news on the data front as well. I think about two weeks ago one of the tables in my database crashed without warning. It was an odd crash- I could still see all of the data, but could not modify it in any way. Here's where the story get a bit more interesting: among the Secret Underground Lair's computing arsenal, we use three flavors of MS Office: 2007, 2010 and 2013. The database is stored on two different computers, and each computer has an external hard drive where the data resides. Data is sometimes entered directly onto one of thes drives, or sometimes it goes on to a flash drive first, and then it is copied. Well, at some point this table MUSIC_RECORDINGS stopped allowing me to modify it in any way. I was unhappy about this, mainly because I didn't want to rebuild the table. But the thing that was most unsettling was that it worked perfectly in the 2007 version of Office. Still, I don't use 2007 all that often. I finally found an older copy that works, so this is the new working version.

Wow. Lots of words. As always, I am hochspeyer, blogging data analysis and management so you don't have to.